Decisions

So, I am faced with a decision.  In the grand scheme of things it's probably not that big of a decision... but right now it seems pretty big.  In an attempt to figure out how to make this decision easily, I decided to Google "how to make decisions" and this is what I came up with:

How to Make Decisions

I love this!  All you need is a pencil and paper and you too can make a hard decision seem easy.  Ironically enough, the difficulty level is noted as "Moderate."

So, I'll follow the steps here and see where it leads me.

(after a short break...)

Well, I realize that I am definitely leaning more towards one decision than the other.  At the beginning of the year I was faced with three options.  My first choice did not work out so well and now I am left with two alternatives.  The second choice may not be my favorite, for various reasons, but it is probably the better choice (and probably should have been my first choice).  I feel like I'm running away from the best alternative.  Am I afraid?  What am I afraid of?

Why does the best choice feel so...
I cannot even begin to describe what I am feeling.  So hesitant.  I guess I just like to know what to expect and I'm afraid of the unknown.  At least with the other choice I know what to expect, even if it's not perfect... and with the best choice I don't know what all to expect.

Thank you to my friend who reminded me that sometimes you have to stop questioning.  I want to know all the possibilities, all the answers, and in life that is just not possible.  There are too many variables, too many unknowns.  And so, I am going to make my move and hope for the best & prepare for the worst.

I am not 100% sure, but I think I have made up my mind.

Now to sleep.  My decision doesn't have to be made tonight, and whatever I choose is not permanent.  That makes me feel better.