Friday, November 19, 2010

Thoughts about relationships...

I've been thinking a lot about relationships.  Relationships with our friends, our families, our spouses (lovers).  This quote popped up and it makes a lot of sense.  This is actually from a webcomic called "Something Positive":
"Sometimes people do things that hurt and it's not because they mean to. They just do. It doesn't necessarily have anything to do with you, but you end up hurt because of it."
Randy K. Milholland, Something Positive Comic, 08-23-05

This goes along with the "Five Life Lessons" I posted earlier this year (see #1).

I do think that we should be aware of how our actions will effect others...but I also believe that sometimes hurt feelings are unavoidable.  My motto is: "Absit reverentia vero" (The truth shouldn't be silenced to spare someone.), and I think this fits perfectly with what Milholland wrote.

Referencing my last blog (and sticking with the relationship topic)... I realized I've been angry with my husband because I'm going to miss him while he's away.  While I know these feelings are normal, it makes me sad because I'd rather be angry than sad.  Is that a productive way to be?  No.  So, I've been trying not to be angry over stupid things that would normally not bother me.  Why waste time being angry?  Instead, I'm going to try and enjoy every minute we have together.  Now I just need to figure out what all I'd like for us to do before he leaves.

If you've gone through a deployment (or separation) before, what's something you wish you would have done?


Rune said...

There's really only one thing I can recommend to do. My mother did it for me when I moved to my dad's.

Make him a box with tokens and objects, like a care package. Wrap each as a gift, tell him to open only one a day.

If you can't do that (I think he has to limit personal items, right?) you can buy a journal from a book store, and make him a sort of scrapbook. Each page will have a little envelope taped to it, with a note or picture or token of some sort.

Let each of those shared memories be a blessing which reminds you both why you love each other, and why your love will keep you together.


Nikky said...

I love the idea of the scrapbook. Thanks for the suggestion! I think I'll have Austin make it with me too. :)